reflections

WIP Wednesday…

/ Jaye Marie and Anita Dawes / 16 Comments

I did wonder how long my calm exterior would last, but I did hope it would stay a little longer, at least until Friday morning and my cardio appointment. I have no idea what they will decide to do about the blockage in my artery; I just hope it’s something simple. All though I have a sneaky feeling it won’t be.

When I woke up this morning, I knew my patience had gone the way of all good things. I wasn’t exactly chewing my nails, but I wanted to.

We all have our own problems, so revealing my shredded emotions was not the way to go, so I had to find a way to keep busy and out of trouble.

I spent the best part of yesterday checking all the links on our website and finding several that were broken. I also found that all of our book images that occupied the right-hand toolbar had no links. I was puzzled, as I knew I had done this at the time.

This problem segued into another, as I discovered that Booklinker, the very useful company supplying writers everywhere with universal book links, is no longer operational. At least, not for me yesterday.

Luckily, our books are on D2Digital, and their links are supposed to be universal. Just a matter of checking and double-checking all of them.

That was yesterday, so what could I do to keep myself quiet and out of trouble today?

Probably not the best time to dive into the current WIP, but that was my first choice. Side-stepping into someone else’s life (and problems) has to be better than anything else I can think of right now.

But wait, I could finish reading Letting Go by Jacquie Biggar. The story of two sisters that I am really enjoying at the moment. As a sister, I can relate to their problems, especially now.

I know what I mean by that; you will just have to guess!

Letting Go Book Description

A coming-of-age novel about the pain of misconceptions and learning from them.

When life gives you lemons…


Izzy

Mom is barely in the grave and the prodigal child is here to pick the bones clean.

I don’t want her here. My sister’s defection is a wound that won’t heal, and her return simply rubs at the scabs covering my heart.

I’ve managed just fine without her. She can go back to her fancy college and forget about us- that’s what she does best anyway.

If only I didn’t need her help. Or miss her so much.

Renee

The day my dad committed suicide I ran. I’ve been running ever since.

Going home is supposed to be the answer. Instead, it makes me question every thoughtless decision I’ve made.

My sister hates me. My little brother barely knows me. And Simon… is engaged.

None of it matters- or so I tell myself. I’m here to make amends and face a past haunted by regret.

As long as I can convince myself to stay.

Letting Go is a young adult romance dealing with tragedy, restitution, and love in all its aspects. The story relates to sensitive topics that may be triggering for some readers.

Rose Tinted Worlds… #Poetry #TheSundayWhirl #Wordle586

/ Jaye Marie and Anita Dawes / 4 Comments

Image by 👀 Mabel Amber, who will one day from Pixabay 

Jaye’s Week… Grazing…

/ Jaye Marie and Anita Dawes / 30 Comments

For most of 2022, I had been flitting from one job to another, spending a few futile moments with each. I was desperately hoping for inspiration, but none of these jobs inspired me, so no progress there.

I am still not quite back to normal life after covid and have discovered a collection of non-functioning cells in my head, masquerading as a brain. A brain that seems to have forgotten how to switch on and get on with anything. I have my fingers crossed that this after-effect of covid will pass, and the sooner, the better!

All through 2022, I honestly thought my writing days were over, as I hadn’t had any inspirational moments in what seemed like forever, and this was starting to seriously upset me.

I didn’t give up, though; perish the thought! I persevered, spending all my spare time re-reading the words languishing on the page.  Trying desperately to trigger a little inspiration, something I could work with.

Finally, I had a breakthrough and managed to write several chapters for the WIP, and it felt so good to be back in the saddle. At least, I hope that’s where I am at the moment.

If last year has taught us anything, though, there’s no point worrying about anything anymore.

The house gets grubbier every day, and going out has definitely lost its appeal. There are still plenty of germs out there, just waiting to grab us!

The weather has been appalling, and we haven’t set foot in the garden for ages.

Our health is the worst it has ever been, to the extent that we now need another carer to take care of us.  Seriously though, we are managing to take care of each other. Not very well, I must admit, but it’s better than nothing.

We hope that 2023 is ready to take on our expectations and find ways to cheer us all up…

We still haven’t had any snow, and it doesn’t look like we will.

I still haven’t had time to assess our progress or decide the best way forward this year. Basically, I just want to curl up on the couch and sleep.

Christmas Passing…

/ Jaye Marie and Anita Dawes / 11 Comments

Image by Angeles Balaguer from Pixabay 

Christmas Eve is always a busy day in our house, although these days, it is a very different kind of busy.

I have fond memories of the good old days when our family came to our house for Christmas dinner. In the beginning, it was comfortable, but as the family grew over the years, it really took some organising.

The cooking was never a problem, as I can cope with almost anything in the kitchen, big or small. Fitting everyone around the table proved hilarious at times. We never had enough chairs, so there was always one person perched on something precarious.

These days our house is too small (and we are getting too old.) We don’t have anywhere near enough chairs or even a big enough table, so we have been succeeded by a granddaughter, one with a large house and a fantastic cook for a husband.

When this arrangement started, it was a strange novelty, eating a meal that I had not cooked, and I didn’t expect to like it, but I did, and now, I always look forward to having the day off.

We wanted Christmas to be special this year but could not have foreseen what 2022 had in store for all of us. Would the ghost of this dying year spoil the holiday?

It feels right for the first time ever that the year is slowly dying, slipping away unnoticed among all the chaos and misery.

We feel the same way as the ghost of Christmas present hovers in the doorway like an unwelcome guest, unsure as we all are as to what will happen next.

2023 is just a few days away, a brand-new year.

A year we are beginning to think will be the same as the last.

But does it have to be?

I woke up this morning with the overwhelming desire to send all the misery, worry and complacency packing along with this dreadful year.

To rekindle the spark that will make us all feel alive again.

At first, we will probably have to ‘Fake it until we make it,’ and push the envelope like crazy until life feels better.

We wish all of our friends and followers a Wonderful New Year, a year full of promise and possibilities, and in a few days, we will be sending out the first of our 2023 newsletters, looking forward and planning a much better year…

GIF by Julius H. from Pixabay 

Remembering Christmas Past…

/ Jaye Marie and Anita Dawes / 29 Comments

Remembering Christmas Past

We have always been a family that goes all out for Christmas. It was always a very special occasion for all of us.

When the children were small, our living room would be transformed into a magical fairyland.

We were never well off, and for most of the year, life was tough, but one way or another, the stops would be pulled way out at Christmas.

Our tree and the decorations were legendary, and the ceiling would be covered in crystal droplets, stars and tinsel garlands.

One year, we had the opportunity to move to a new house on Christmas Eve, so we packed everything away and reinstalled everything in the new place. It took all night, but that Christmas was very special.

My childhood was dismal; I don’t remember celebrating any Christmas or birthdays, so I became obsessed with making up for it when I grew up.

We have always tried to come up with a different theme every year and have had trees of every colour and size. Once, we even had an upside-down tree!

Christmas Present

Sadly, this year is going to be different. The family are all grown up, and some are married, so we won’t be spending Christmas Day together for the very first time.

We will, however, be celebrating with them on Boxing Day instead.

Time moves on, and we are getting seriously old and beginning to feel left behind. The thought of the Christmas future is out of focus, a distant dream that may fade away…

We still have a million jobs to do to be ready for the big day, so we are signing off until after Christmas.

Wishing everyone everywhere, a brilliant and very happy Christmas…

A Visit to the Doctor, not what it used to be!

/ Jaye Marie and Anita Dawes / 11 Comments

I played hooky yesterday.

The earache that has been gradually driving me mad for months seemed even worse and, with the added headache, left me in a foul mood.

In the past, when this happened, the best thing to do was lie low. Find someone to hide and keep my head down.

Not wanting to do anything doesn’t happen to me very often, and for some reason, I didn’t feel guilty about it either.

Maybe that will come later, I thought.

I can hear you all thinking I should have seen my doctor already. It may surprise you that I have seen my doctor on numerous occasions about this problem. To date, all I have been given is a spray for my nose, which hasn’t done a darn thing.

Anyway, ever the optimistic soul, I made another appointment. I won’t go into a rant over how long I had to wait for this day to arrive, as that is another can of worms.

She looked in both of my ears and pronounced them fine. No infection, wax or anything that could be causing me pain.

And that was that.

When I asked (fearless and persistent, two of my better traits) why I had been having this earache for so long, she smiled and said I must be going through a bad patch. I couldn’t argue with that, what with the recent covid episode and the additional heart trouble earlier this year.

I am beginning to think that those rumours about the lack of duty of care for those over seventy may be true. When my angina had me in hospital this summer, they found one of my main arteries completely blocked. The subsequent angiogram couldn’t shift the blockage. All I got then, apart from a lot of sympathy from the poor technician who had tried four times to clear it, was a smile from the heart consultant, a box of statins, and a see you in six weeks.

I am still waiting for this appointment three months later.

Added to that is my asthma which has been completely out of control since covid, and the ever-present arthritis, which is doing its level best to keep me indoors; I don’t have much chance of keeping a good mood going…

I did enjoy my day off, though and may do it again.

Our Christmas Angel… #Poetry

/ Jaye Marie and Anita Dawes / 10 Comments 


Our Christmas Angel

Old Christmas memories come calling
When snow did lie all around
Snow angels, snowmen, the days delight
Children laughing, presents wrapped
Warm mince pies waiting
Custard stirring in time with Grandads snoring
Mum flapping while dad sharpens the turkey knife
Big brother calling, time to come in to help lay the table
Three of us rush the door together
Managing to squeeze through
Like the pop of a champagne cork flying across the room
We land in a giggling pile of legs and arms
Mother calling, she need help!
I know this isn’t true, she likes to give us something to do
To feel a part of our Christmas cheer
God bless, Mum… she’s our Christmas angel…


©AnitaDawes2020