The Wizards will is strong today A lucky penny he threw my way In my pocket, I let it sit. The next day I found a job Life is looking up I thought People say I am a fool to heed his words A vagrant, that sits alone on the bench all day. Yet in his eyes, I see much more His ragged clothes turn most away I see a suit of golden hue His footsteps light when he walks His age disguised by a trick of sight. So much they miss with noses turned What fate, what future stands without? First condemning with sight and sound. Let those walk by who see him not I keep my penny out of sight My life I see in his hands. A light to pin my hopes upon... ©AnitaDawes2022
This was my jigsaw puzzle today on FB, it says so much, don’t you think?
The year of the Tiger brings bravery, wisdom and strength, all of the attributes I need right now.
I love tigers, so maybe this year will be wonderful after all…
(This post has been a long time coming, and at times I didn’t think I would be writing it)
Worry is a terrible thing, it steals the quality of life from right under your nose, reducing your world into a place of doom and gloom. We have been sitting on a massive worry these past six months and have refused to start the new year until we had good news.
I desperately tried to keep everything normal, finish my WIP and keep the website going, but I have to admit it was a poor imitation of the real thing, and I apologise for that.
I have not been sharing much of this with our friends and followers and this may seem strange after all your incredible support when Anita had that massive heart attack in 2020. Your love and good wishes pulled us through that terrible time, but when disaster struck again last year, it seemed far more serious, and we really felt that talking about it might make it worse.
Anita’s heart is still severely damaged, and despite having two stents and a pacemaker fitted, it only barely functions. When a series of lumps started to appear around her neck last year, the alarm bells started ringing again.
Because of the raging virus and all the hospital delays, it took months to have the lumps investigated. The consultant mentioned cancer and after deliberation, they finally decided to remove part of her thyroid. Surgery was a problem as they didn’t think her heart was strong enough, but they said that delaying it was not an option.
This was a nightmare time for all the family, especially Anita, for she can’t abide hospitals at the best of times. She has never been seriously ill and to be struck down by two life-threatening illnesses almost at the same time seems very unfair. She made it through this surgery without incident, but we had to wait two agonising weeks to get the results of the tests.
By this time, we were all terrified and sick with worry, dreading the news.
On the day of the appointment, I felt sick to my stomach but somehow kept a smile on my face. I think I held my breath when she was called into the consultant’s office, but five minutes later the door opened and she rushed out of the room, a massive smile on her face. We watched in amazement as she ran out of the ENT department to a standing ovation from the nurses.
By this time, we knew the news must be good, but I wanted to know how good. Just before we all reached the lifts, I caught her arm and made her stop walking. ‘Well,’, I said and waited.
She stood there laughing at me as if she just won the lottery, and I didn’t think she was going to say anything.
Quietly, and for the first time with a serious face, she looked at me and said, ‘there is no cancer…’
All the way home in the car, she kept repeating those words and her relief was wonderful to see. Despite the odds, her poor old ticker had survived the surgery and she was cancer-free.
But four days later, we had to rush to the hospital as she was having trouble breathing again. She is now back home, but it seems that worrying isn’t going anywhere after all.
She is looking better, although still very weak and breathless much of the time. The list of her medications grows ever longer, but … and you may have noticed this, none of what happened has stopped her writing her poetry.
Now all I have to do is get my own head back together!
The grass crunched under my shoes as I trudged towards the empty birdfeeders. The cold quickly found its way through my thin shirt, and the air hurt my throat and lungs with each breath, but the birds were hungry, and my conscience would not let me rest indoors.
My fingers, never fond of the cold, grew painful as I wrestled with the bucket of fat balls and bag of the finest seed mixture, before coping with the intricacies of the feeders.
The sunlight was blinding and most welcome, yet ineffective this early in the day against the thick frost and biting temperatures. It would be another hour at least before everything warmed up and the frost melted, only to reappear the following morning. When I finished, I stood back, pleased to have done my bit for our feathered friends. I looked around the garden, at how different it seemed these days. The plants had died down and were fast asleep, everything wearing a thick dusting of what looked like icing sugar. Here and there, late flowers had paid the price and were crystalised for their tardiness.
I started to wonder what fate had in store for us this year. Lord knows it hadn’t started well already and I knew it would be weeks before there was any hope of an improvement…
Every morning, without fail, I systematically clear my emails, which are mostly spam but something I cannot ignore. My day would not be right if I didn’t do this. Usually, I don’t have loads of rules, preferring to do what I like, when I want, but this one thing is a must-do job.
Then I log in to WP.
I read and answer any comments and then turn to the Reader List. It can sometimes take me over an hour to read them all, but I love every minute. On any one day, I communicate with people, new conversations, or ongoing ones—so many interesting chats about varied subjects from people all over the world.
When we began blogging over ten years ago, I never knew that it would grow into this huge, wonderful club where I can smile, sigh, laugh and cry, all in the space of an hour.
I marvel at the fantastic images and artwork, share in the joy of writers finally getting a break, share the sadness of losing either people, pets, or sometimes their minds (more common than you might think) and laugh at the antics of children and animals alike.
These lovely people have become our extended family, a family that share their lives, loves, and sometimes, even their limitations.
We began blogging to help further our writing careers, but somewhere along the way, it has become so much more than that…
I have been trying hard lately to be more organised, to find ways to stop life from getting in the way of everything, but it continues to beat me or find ways to slow me down.
There are days when I wish I could say okay, you win, and stagger away like a sensible old lady.
Not happening. There is still so much I want to do; in fact, the list seems to get longer every day.
I hope it’s just my imagination, but I seem to be getting slower, and shock horror! I am making more mistakes than usual. There were serious errors on my WIP, bad enough for me to want to scrap it and start over.
But I didn’t.
Being stubborn usually saves me so much eventually.
So, thank you to all our friends and followers… and hope we all have a better year in 2022…
And so it Begins…