Category: disapointing
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A Sorry Saturday…
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It is gloomy outside today, and despite having the light on in my office, it feels pretty gloomy in here too. I keep pushing all those negative thoughts and feelings away, but they don’t go far, sneaking back whenever I try to think of better things. Much as I hate to admit, I think the…
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The End of the Road…
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Yesterday morning was one of the worst mornings I have had since this miserable situation began in March of this year. I awoke with tears in my eyes, tears I could not stop for almost an hour. There was no particular reason; I wasn’t thinking or feeling anything particular. My brain doesn’t switch on until…
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One of the worst days…
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Yesterday began like most days. I awoke in agony, triggering a mini bout of depression, wondering when I would get the next blessed hospital appointment that I was waiting for. The latest bulletin was ‘sometime in December/January’. This seems like an awful long time to wait, but then I have been in pain since before…
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Silent Sunday…
Mother Nature has thrown everything at us this past week, but I am happy to report that today the skies are blue and the sun is shining. I seem to have had every emotion thrown at me too during this complicated week, but like the weather outside my window, I am all sunny and smiling…
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The writing on the Wall…
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“The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ,Moves on: nor all thy Piety nor WitShall lure it back to cancel half a Line,Nor all thy Tears wash out a Word of it.” This post was inspired by Omar Khayam and is about the way my life, and just everything else, it seems, has changed lately. I…
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Sunday Thoughts…
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I am so glad to have come to the end of a very dismal week. A week where I couldn’t quite get going, or know the reason why. A week where I have been doing a lot of thinking, trying to figure out the best way forward through the constant pain. I gave up a…
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The Darker side of me…
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The Darker side of me… I never knew I had a dark side, not really. I do remember having these small snarky feelings when I was a child, towards the latest person to tick me off or stand me in the corner. I am a good-natured person, I have found that life is usually better…
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No two days are the same…
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As a child, I could rely on the weather and the seasons. It was always warm and sunny in the Summer and cold and invariably wet in the Winter. At least, that is how I remember it. It was comforting to know where you were and what to expect, that any deviations would always keep…
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Another Day from Hell…
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Yesterday turned out to be a nightmare. From the moment I staggered across the office to my Windows PC, everything I touched went wrong, failed to load, or couldn’t be found. I am not a lover of technology, but as long as it does what it says on the tin, I can usually cope well…
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Imposter Syndrome anyone?
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The minute I opened my eyes this morning, I knew what had been bothering me for some time now. I had been wondering why everything seems so different these days. This year has been a nightmare for me, but I never once thought it might be me who ended up changing. When this thought occurred…