I don’t usually dwell on anything I cannot do or have anymore. There have been so many this past year that I would be a basket case by now if I carried on about all of them.
I don’t know why this particular one has managed to sneak through, but here it is. I was watching TV, and an advert with bees was showing. As I watched, one of these bees was having a bath, sitting in a cloud of bubbles.
I was suddenly gripped with a strange longing. I wanted to climb into those bubbles and sink in the warm water.
It has been a while since I had a bath, due mainly to something that happened the last time I had one.
I was sitting there, enjoying the warmth of the water, scrubbing parts of myself with a sponge. I remember feeling very happy.
When it came time to step out, I found that I couldn’t get to my feet. I struggled for a while before letting the water out, thinking this would help. It didn’t. It made everything worse. I slipped and slid on the wet surface, and as I tried to figure out what was wrong. I had never had this problem before. My sister tried to help, which was hilarious.
I tried to turn over, thinking to try again on my knees, but this made matters worse.I must have eventually managed to get out of the bath, but how I did this has faded from my memory, but I have avoided having a bath ever since.
Since my paralysis early this year, I have not been able to shower either. The day I will feel safe enough to take a shower is coming soon, I’m sure. At the moment though, the idea of trying to wash myself while hanging on to the safety rail terrifies me.
In case you’re wondering, I make do with strip washes at the bathroom sink, sitting on the edge of the bath for support!
I will probably never be safe enough to take a bath, but I’m looking forward to a shower one of these days…
How do any of you cope with those things you cannot do anymore?
Love and best wishes from
Jaye 💕
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