Locked In
My life has only just begun
Yet I am stuck between two worlds.
I have a need to forget, to alter my thoughts
This ordinary cafe where the waiters sing
Let me in, with no way out
Mother told me never to hit
“Talk, let them see you.”
She has no idea, the mood
Of those that hold me here.
I smell revenge, the air thick
With a need to spill blood, my blood
My will is weak. I have no strength to act
I need a weapon to fight for freedom
This is not my world
Whitewashed walls, pills to make me sleep
Sunlight blinds these walls of white
But my mind can see the place to be.
Outside, I see my mothers smile
She sits in shade beneath our tree
That father planted when I was five.
My world is there, by her side.
Voices tell me she is not there
I took her life when I was ten.
Can this be a dream that keeps me locked in?
I pray that fate will not charge me to live it over again…
©Anita Dawes
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