Blurring: Grief’s Stages are Personal, Random and Unexpected.

Chronicles of an Orange-Haired Woman!

There is an awful lot of black and white thinking when it comes to suffering, the stages of grief, bereavement and more generalised sadness. It is as if, in some people’s minds, there are sharp distinctions between the confusing multiplicity of human emotions, and each stage should be traversed in its proper order and at a specific time.

To me, the subtlety, the individual nature of woe and the personality and life story of the grieving human make for a canvas which is far more pointillist, impressionistic, even blurred, than some might wish to believe. There are no black outlines; the centre is not blinding white or a neat and recognisable shape of primary colour. Instead, green merges with blue (from which, of course, it originally derived – at least in part) and orange snuggles into black.

This weekend, I have been feeling sad. There are many reasons. Part…

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