Jaye Marie and Anita Dawes

Image by Stefan Keller from Pixabay

Jane had decided it might be fun to make up one good lie about herself daily.

So the next time someone asked her about her parents, she said they had died in a car crash when she was five years old. When, in fact, they were alive and kicking and on holiday in Gibraltar.

Instant sad face.

‘Oh God, I’m so sorry…’

‘No need, it was a long time ago.’

That one lie led to many more.

‘So, who brought you up?’

‘An aunt. She’s ancient, I might add, so life was a little stale compared to my friends. Old fashioned, I ran away when I was sixteen. I’m only back for the funeral and the will reading. That old mansion of hers is mine. You must come to tea sometime.’

As she walked home, not to a mansion, mind you, she wondered how she could stop this rolling stone from gathering more moss…

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Today’s lie takes on a life of its own.

One minute, she hears herself telling someone, ‘my father is an airline pilot.’ Next, ‘he’s a backing singer for the Rolling Stones. My mother is starring in a movie with David Tennant,’ when in fact her mother works in M & S, and her father drives a black cab.

or…

‘I have been married for three years. It’s our anniversary tonight. Mark, my husband, has bought me a new car. One I have dreamt about. Imported from the USA, a red Mustang convertible.’ So I must rush home, ladies. I want to be there when it arrives.’

She heard a little voice in her head say, one of these days, you’ll trip over that tongue of yours.

She had to admit the lies did explode that day, like a bomb going off, but somehow, she managed to keep up with themt and sound convincing. At least she could see no trace of doubt on their faces.

All that, and she had forgotten to tell them where Mark had taken her when he proposed. Never mind, there’s always tomorrow.

One day, Mark or someone like him might come into her life. She might find herself driving down the high street in a red convertible Mustang.

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She has one of those faces people like to talk to. She can sit in a café, and before her coffee is half drunk, someone will sit opposite her. She always sends them home with a story to tell their friends. That way, her lies go further than her reach.

She joined two book clubs, but she needs to keep a check on which lies belong to which club. She knows she can’t keep this up for too long, but you would be surprised how many people she manages to speak to. Some, in the strangest of places.

Standing in any queue or bumping into someone’s trolley in a supermarket is always good for a quick chat, especially if you manage to make eye contact.

Apologies spoken, you pass each other in the next aisle as if fate has thrown you together.

She has even been lucky enough to snag a date on one of her shopping trips…

I’m not a compulsive liar, but Jane definitely is…