Jaye Marie and Anita Dawes

Image by Bellergy RC from Pixabay

I have been feeling decidedly un-normal for the last few days…

Nothing seems to be right anymore and it’s affecting me in some funny ways. I can’t work, write or clean the house. I can cope with difficult, awkward, even nasty, but what can you do when normal takes a hike, leaving you disorientated and more than a bit lost?

My usual method of coping in these situations is to wing it, and if this fails, I fake it. I have been a pretender for most of my life, and this has guided me through some terrible situations. Situations I don’t have anymore, thank heavens, so I am out of the habit of pretending.

Years ago, I would have fought this feeling, and to be fair, I have tried that. Only it didn’t work. I have been so tired, unable to find the necessary strength to dig my heels in. I honestly thought I had reached the end of my blogging career, my writing and pretty much everything else. My get up and go had finally deserted me…

Yesterday, I had to visit the dentist for my annual check-up. I didn’t want to go, but I had been putting it off for too long.

It was freezing cold, a grey and miserable day, but I found myself enjoying the walk. The dentist was in a good mood and didn’t keep me waiting for ages. A quick look around my chops, and he declared me good to go.

I couldn’t help smiling, for that was definitely not a fair description of me at the moment.

I wasn’t looking forward to the walk home, as my legs were tired. Inspired by my first perfect dentist appointment, I found myself walking into Costa’s for a hot chocolate. The place was crawling with noisy schoolchildren, so I decided not to stay, and sipped it all the way home…

I am not sure what made the difference, but the black, un-normal mood lifted. I felt more like my normal self as enthusiasm wound its way back into my heart and mind…

A most welcome development…