Jaye Marie and Anita Dawes

Dear Santa,

We’ve sort of established that human two-legses are weird, right? Well, what about this whole mince pie thing they do every Christmas?

“I’ll have to make some mince pies,” she says. My ears pricked up at that!In my eyes, a mince pie is full of mince… that ground up beef stuff… with gravy and pastry. That makes them fair game for small dogs, as far as I’m concerned.

But… “No,” she says, “not allowed,” she says. “Raisins,” she says.

So… the mince pies are really raisin pies? “They used to be mince-meat,” she says, as if ‘used to’ is going to help. “With raisins.” So, let me get this straight… they took the good stuff out and shoved more sugar in instead? No wonder they dive around like mad things this time of year and don’t know how to chill!

‘Cause they eat a lot of ’em. She…