#Jaye’s Journal ~ Week 35

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In this hot weather, some shop keepers put out bowls of water for any passing dog that might be passing, and this kindness always makes me smile. So imagine my surprise when I was offered a drink of water while browsing the bookshelves at my local charity shop. It was very welcome too!

The woman in charge had one of those containers with a tap and a supply of paper cups. Such a thoughtful gesture in this unbearably hot weather.


It is noticeably cooler today, so I might be able to think better, something I found impossible yesterday. Finishing PayBack, my WIP was hard enough, but coming up with a rivetting blurb has proved to be beyond my capabilities this week. I have written dozens of them, only to throw most of them into the bin.

I thought about running a poll or whatever you call it, to see what our readers thought, but having not done one of these before, I decided to print the top runners on this post.


Blurb Version One:


A serial killer roams the streets of Brighton. When the case lands on Detective David Mallory’s desk, his own personal demon may prevent him from bringing this vicious monster to justice.

As the body count rises, Mallory finds himself sinking under the weight of a heavy secret – one that could jeopardise his job and his reputation.


Will Taylor’s life is falling apart. Suspected of the sadistic murder of his beautiful wife, he is fired from his post at the University. With so many circumstances stacked against him, how can he prove his innocence?


When their complicated lives become entangled, will David Mallory summon the strength and courage to stop the killer?

And can Will Taylor prove his innocence, reconcile the past and make a new life for himself?


Blurb Version Two:

As a sadistic murderer preys on the women of Brighton, Detective David Mallory hovers on the edge of the life he wants but haunting childhood memories prevent him from moving forward. Until he can reconcile his past and come to terms with who he is truly meant to be, his fight for justice for the slain women will prove more and more difficult.

With an entire city counting on him to stop this madman, can he summon the strength and courage to stop the killer in his tracks and live in his truth?


Blurb Version Three:

A city on edge. A detective on shaky ground.

A serial killer roams the streets of Brighton, hunting for his next victim.

When the case lands on Detective David Mallory’s desk, his personal demon may prevent him from bringing this vicious monster to justice.

As the body count rises, Mallory finds himself sinking under the weight of a heavy secret – one that could jeopardize his job and his reputation.

With the pressure building, can the troubled detective reconcile his issues and solve the case before more women die?


So, what do you think of these blurbs?

Please give me your honest opinion.

Tell me what you think, as my brain has given up and I cannot hope to start launching PayBack without a decent description!

#Jaye’s Journal Week Three



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Jaye’s Journal. Week 3


Despite still feeling like the remains of a dog’s dinner, I am determined to sort out the mess that is masquerading as my WIP, PayBack.

I knew it was a mess, but not how bad it really was. The experts say you shouldn’t worry about the state of your first draft, that it is more important to just get it all down on the page. You get to make it shine during the editing process.

I kept trying to tell myself this, but obviously wasn’t very convincing, so over the weekend, I tackled the first Act, all twenty sprawling chapters. After much rearranging and second thoughts, I reduced it to twelve chapters and felt quite smug pleased with my efforts.

This week has not been like that. All I can think is that some other idiot must have written the second Act. Although I was an editor long before I became a writer, this did not prepare me for the shambles I found. Continuity was simply not present. It looked for all the world like I had completely forgotten the basics. Instead of throwing it away in disgust, I kept reading, as a good editor should. There can be a brilliant story hiding under the waffle and confusion.Well, that’s what I hoped!

Gradually, I began to see what needed to be done to create a better story. The thread was there all along. PayBack would need substantial editing, but the framework was taking shape and I felt so much more confident about it.

I’m not sure how it all went so wrong, but my other books didn’t give me so much trouble.


Something else has been happening too. Even though I have been spending a lot of time sorting out PayBack, I seem to have more time available for other things too. I know this doesn’t make sense, but I have noticed before that time can stretch if you lose yourself in a project.

For all we know, time is not constant. This would explain why some days seem so much longer than others. All I can say, is I am grateful for the help, wherever it came from…



I am trying to discover just how good D2D is. They talk the talk and it sounds wonderful. So easy to have all your books on there and all that, but can they walk the walk?

Some of our prospective buyers have reported problems when they try to buy our books, so I am wearing my detective bonnet!

Has anyone else experienced problems with these people?

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Jaye’s Journal (from the middle of insanity)




My brain needs a disciplinary, as I can no longer make it behave.

Mind you, it must be contagious, for my laptop and tablet are exhibiting similar tendencies.

I have just spent the best part of an hour, first with the laptop and then the tablet, trying to run through my emails from the comfort of my armchair.

The laptop was on a go-slow, so I switched to the tablet.

This annoying piece of crap had decided not to respond at all. Patience personified, I kept trying, only for the battery to drain away faster than a chocolate teapot. Something it shouldn’t have been able to do, seeing as it wasn’t actually doing anything.


I can feel the day coming when I will take a hammer to the both of them, as I am not sure how much longer my brain can cope with these insanity-inducing contraptions.

It wouldn’t be so bad if I wasn’t aware of all the wonderful things they can do. When in a good mood, of course.

But I ask you, is it asking too much to have a piece of equipment that actually does what it says on the tin?

We wouldn’t stand for such substandard performance from any other electrical object, so for all that’s Holy, do we put up with it?

The main desktop PC is not immune to such shenanigans, it’s just sneakier. Its favourite trick at the moment is ignoring whole sentences while I am busy typing them.

I get no warning, no sign that something has gone awry. The first I know about it is when I try to read the work back, only to find yawning great holes where parts of my story are missing.

I tell you, it is beginning to feel like a conspiracy…

On the bright side, and I do try to find this, even on those grey days, nothing can affect my pen and paper. Sometimes I am so glad that I can write, blissfully, as far away from technology as I can get. As happy as Larry, knowing that I am in total charge of the creative process.

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So, to end on a much happier note, I have to report that the first draft of PayBack, my WIP, is almost finished. I have enjoyed writing it so much, that even the thought of all that editing is not denting my good mood in the slightest!